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Writer's Block: Go it alone

Do you think society puts too much pressure on people to be in relationships and/or have children? Do you think this ostracizes people who would be perfectly content to remain single and/or child-free? Is this pressure worse around the holidays?

I think society is geared toward marketing all of it's products to a demographic. We are a society built AROUND our business and income. When those two things become the defining factor of a society, it's demographics, which are just ways to group people up to sell them things, become more relevant than the people in that actual society.

So I think that for sure society puts pressure on people to get into a relationship and to have a family, but I don't think that it's because they don't like people without a family or a significant other, I think it's because we've become a nation of demographics, and it's really hard for us to see past that. I think that it's gotten so bad that it's even hard for most people to see THEMSELVES beyond the demographic group that they belong to.

The average american with a family and kids is the vast majority of americans, and therefore, is the group of people you want to target your ads to, your products to, your services to and your motto's, saying's and sales pitches too. I think that the pressure is a bi-product of our nations greed and ignorance.

We are constantly being sold something. All the time. Almost anywhere we go, and I think when you don't belong to majority demographic it's very easy to feel ostracized if you don't understand why that pressure is there to begin with. It's all an illusion there to make you buy things that you don't need.

Yes I've watched a little bit too much fight club, but just think about this situation and it makes a lot of sense. We're a nation that's proud of being greedy and making other people's money our own money by any means necessary, it only makes sense that we're led by ignorant, shallow principles. In this case we're not even led by principles but by advertisements.

And it goes deeper than this, look at the way our presidential election runs. You can buy your way onto the ballot. This gives corporations the oppurtunity to pick and choose who gets to run, unless the candidate is extremely wealthy on their own. (Most of the time the candidate obtained their millions through said corporations anyway, so it's all the same...) It's gotten so deep into our system that it defines who we are, who makes our decisions, and how we think about our own lives... (the pressure that's felt by those who do not belong to the big shiny demographics waiting in line to be sold to.)

The fact that we even question ourselves and feel bad because we are different from one another is absolutely ridiculous when you think about it, if we didn't our television and all of these poster of the perfect humans telling how to behave and how to dress and conduct ourselves at each and every stage of our lives, we'd be forced to live our OWN lives and they probably wouldn't be very similar at all...

Human diversity is beautiful. We've become a nation that can't handle all of the business and marketing and demographics. Hopefully things will change soon...


Writer's Block: Play it again, Sam

If you could only listen to one CD for the rest of your life, what would you choose and why?

One cd... wow, that's kind of a tuffy... The first cd that comes to mind for me is Californication, by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. That cd has it all, it has your mellow shit and it has that get it shit for when your pissed off. Really, that album has a song for any mood. I would recommend listening to it and if you haven't heard it by now, your way behind and your in need of some serious emergency learnin.

Maybe another album I would choose would be Waking the Fallen by Avenged Sevenfold. That's another masterpiece, seriously... it's another one of those cd's with a song for many moods, though it definitely doesn't cover as much ground as Californication, but I would consider Californication one of those classic albums, so it's hard to compare the two...

Well shit, I had better go to sleep so I can go find a job in the morrow. It's been fun internet and all of you dwelling in cyberspace. So you have a great night, or day, or whatever the fuck it is where ever the fuck you are.


So much shit!!!

     So, the past couple of weeks have been incredibly stressful.  It's really been taking a lot out of me.  It's one of those times that just seems like it's one thing after the other.  I mean it's not as bad as having two members of your family die within hours of each other... (which actually happened to me! I'll tell the story later...), but damn has it been getting to me.
     So, first of all, I'd been working two jobs right?  One at this little pizza place down the road and graveyards at our local Burger King, mostly because it was close to home and it was one of the only places I could think of that I would be able to get an actual overnight position at.  So I had been doing my thing, I had my schedule all worked out all sexy so I had plenty of days off and was still making enough money to pay all my bills.
     So I go into work one evening, and everybody is talking about how the local burger king had been on the news only minutes before our shift started, but nobody really knew that much about it, they just said that some of the students (The American culture students from other countries brought in to work and study american culture throught immersion.) had been on the news.  They named the ones they saw on tv and I realized that I had known all of the ones that they mentioned.  I also noticed something else that was a little strange.  Most nights I would work with at least one of the students, and this night none of them were working, and they had just hired a handful of new people.
     Now, I only worked there three nights a week, so I wasn't able to keep up with all the shit that went down there, and honestly I didn't give a shit about any of it. until this happened.
     So, I get off work and am lying in bed about to doze off, and I decide to get online and do some research and see if I can't find something about the local burger king and the students, so I go on google and find the exact story everyone had been talking about.  It was SO fucked up... after reading the story I was wide awake and very very pissed off.
     As it turns out, burger king owns some houses that they had been renting out to some of these students.  And one of these houses was a little tiny shack about the size of a smalll garage.  It was filled up with air mattresses and a tiny dirty bathroom.  The windows didn't open and all they had to cook on was one skillet to share between the FIVE of them that lived in this little shack and a little electric two range portable stovetop.
     According to the story online, these guys complained to the management that the living situation was not satisfactory and burger king responded by first firing them, then calling the police to evict them.  The cops showed and saw the living situation that these were being forced into, and the rest is history, Burger King is now under investigation by immigration.
     Anyway, after I found this story, I called my boss and literally asked him what the fuck was going on with this.  I told him that I found a really fucked up story on the internet about some of the students and started drilling him with questions, he copped out and said he couldn't comment and that the store manager would be there later if I wanted to talk to her, so i told him I would definitely be there. 
     So I showed up and I quit.  I told them that I couldn't work for people like that, I mean they pretty boldly showed that they don't give a shit about people, or their rights, or labor laws or any of it.  I mean this was basically modern day slavery, they were bringing these kids in, charging them 350 each a month to live in that little shack and charging them for rides to work.  One of them that I talked to, said he had been working at this store for like a month and had still not gotten any money out of the deal, he said that whenever he would get paid he would just have to pay it all back to burger king.
     I gave them my two cents and I stuck strong to my beliefs.  I figured that I could always just get more hours at the pizza place. So I told everybody that worked with me at the pizza place about Burger King and how i had quit.  A couple had asked if I was gonna be needing more hours and I told them that I would.  And everything seemed like it was gonna work out the way I had planned and it was all gonna be fine and dandy.  So the weekend came and I was happy.
     Sunday rolls around and I hadn't worked since friday, and I go in to get a pizza and I decide to look at the schedule since it was laying out on the table, and I notice that my name is still on the schedule, but there are no hours next to it at all.  I figured that maybe they were adjusting my hours or something, I was a little worried about it, but I didn't think it was that big of a deal...
     So I go in the next day to see if they had fixed the problem or not, and they totally hadn't and the schedule had been hung up, so it was the official up to date schedule.  And I was still without any hours.  So I filed for unemployment while I'm looking for another job.  there's really nothing here.  It's crazy because it feels the recession has finally hit home for real.  I mean both my jobs (when I had them lol) were slowing down drastically, and now there are really no jobs out there at all.  There's a job I found at the workforce center roofing for eight bucks an hour.  I'm gonna apply cause I have to cause there's really nothing else, but that work is barely worth fifteen bucks an hour, it's gonna really suck dick doing it for only eight bucks...
     I don't know, maybe things will work out.  the band is really the only going good right now.  We're starting to get some momentum built up with our myspace and we're finally starting to work out some shows... so once all that gets going it's gonna be really amazing!

Anyway, I should prolly get to bed so I can get up early and start the job hunt again... you know, I think looking for work is something I hate far worse than working... lol

     So, hangin out in Worland tonight.  Came up for a cousins wedding.  It was pretty crazy, and it was cool to see some family at an event other than a funeral.  Everybody seemed to be having a pretty good time and it was cool...
So, once again it's that time.  Time to post about nothing and give an update that isn't due!  So... where to start.

Let's see, some of the big things.  We're still trying to get to salt lake, but I've managed to find myself in that rabbit hole of unemployment... I've also decided that it's going to be my FIRST priority to get a fucking car when I start making some money.  I'm fucking through with this bullshit of not having a vehicle.  And I'm not even gonna try to go to slc without a vehicle.  It's hard enough to get around riverton without a vehicle, fuck trying to get around a city without a vehicle.

We've also accepted that the move may come a little later than previously expected and decided to start playing music here in riverton again.  I recently started playing with Organized Despair, our brothers in arms here in wyoming, but there's just something that feels off.  So we're making something new.  We've got most of the members we need, we're still kinda looking for vocals.  Hopefully this week we'll find out exactly what's going on with everything and start making some music, but we'll see. 

Whatever we start it's going to be bullshit.  That's the only pre-plan we have.  Lots of bullshit.  We'll have to be serious once we get to salt lake, so this is going to be the opposite of that.  Hopefully we'll manage to piss some people off with it... yea, that should be our goal.  To piss people off!

Huh.... well, we'll see what happens I guess.


Jun. 12th, 2007

Okay, so here's an update.  I totally got a job finally.  So that relieves ALOT of that stress that was making me freak out.  And starting on the Ozzfest tix this morning, so that's another plus.  Sara your right. 

You can have your job back.

Keep it metal,
I'm hungry and tired right now... It's 5 o'clock in the morning and I haven't slept... I gotta kick the job hunt into the next gear today too... fuck.

I wish I could just move to slc now and find a job down there, I'm just gonna end up finding some shit job up here, barely scraping by during the move and then have to do the same thing in like a fucking month...


oh well... I think I'm gonna get something to eat, then go to bed... and hopefully in the morning I'll wake up with a job. That would be awesome...

Oh yea, some other biggish news... Kinda-sorta finished my first song since the break-up! It's quite a bit different than what I'm used to. I'm not used to writing by myself... especially when it comes to the lyrical aspects of songwriting... but I'm happy with how it's turning out! The song was written on acoustic, but I was experimenting a little bit, and I really think that with joe and a band thrown into the mix it could be one of those songs that are released as a heavy song, and then has an acoustic version! I can't wait to get slc so we start recruiting members for a new band! I really don't know what to expect at all... I've been kinda trying to think of some ways to audition drummers, cause that will be one of the biggest things... and I think that I may have come up with something.

What we can do is just record the guitar parts to a couple complete songs that we've written. Put out fliers with our phone numbers. When someone is interested we can meet up with them and give them the cd and tell them to write drum parts for the songs... meet up in like a week or two and see what they have! If we could get our shit together and actually do that, I think it would be a great process for everyone involved!


Keep it metal,

Mar. 17th, 2007

So the question hasn't been asked, right? And just for the record our pretentious answers that we've so eagerly spat out at our convenience have been far from the right ones. And what is all this for, who is it for, and why are we doing it?

What do we convey in our journeys? What message of worth do we pass onto those we meet along the way? Is it worth the broken back? If you met you, would you really give a damn.

In what ways do we make life worth living? Everybody plays a roll somewhere, so what is ours. And just say for a minute that we knew the answer... would we have the strength to change the answer if we didn't like what we found?

Are we really putting anything to the pot, or are we just the drain through which the water runs?


shit, fuck, damn, ahhhh!

I'm stressin out so fuckin bad right now! The booking thing is really getting to me... I know we can do it, and I'm on the verge of a few bookings... I'm just scared that we won't be able to meet the quota's and we'll be blacklisted in SLC as a band that isn't worth booking because we can't draw a crowd!

I talked to a couple people today and they all seemed very interested, and said to send e-mails with the information. Well upon closer inspection of some of their websites, they have a certain quota that each band has to draw each night, or they won't be booked again, and when that situation occurs, and club people talk... it's just a bad place to be.

It's like, you need to be able to draw like 60 people for a monday, 80 for a thursday and 100 for friday's and saturdays. And I thought about just e-mailing the guy and telling him straight up, you know, we're from Wyoming, we don't have a fan-base down there yet, I don't know if your club would be a good place for us to start? But I don't want him to go spreading it around that that piraya band from Wyoming can't draw a crowd and we won't get booked anywhere. But, again, I don't just want to leave him hangin, cause it's a nice club and I don't want that contact to be lost...

Shit, I just don't know. I just know that when things do get worked out and we're able to play some decent shows down here next year to some decent crowds... this freaking out up all night shit will be totally worth it!

So yeah,

Keep it metal,

PS. I'll try to do a voice post at some point this week...


My thoughts

Hey everybody. Again, it's been a very long time since my last post. (But that's ok I guess, cause at least I'll have something to talk about.)

I'm here in SLC visiting Cassi for the week, and it's great. It's so nice to spend some time away from little Riverton. There is SOO much here! And I don't mean that there's just a lot more to do, but when it comes to issues of the band, there really is A FUCKING LOT for us here!

There is basically a club or bar with live music on every other block down here! That is Great news for us! We had been debating for awhile on whether to move to SLC or to Denver when the time came, and I was more than sure that Slc was the right decision, just based on what was obvious on the surface, and from what I had learned going to some of the bigger shows in both places. It seemed as though the folks in Salt Lake that frequent the concerts, usually go from beginning to end. Where as alot of the denver crowd, (To my experience), comes to see "their" band and then take off.

But putting that aside, here in Salty Lake, there are even "Local" sections in the music stores! Can you believe this! That is unheard of! I have never seen this type of thing before. There are a shit load of independent newspapers that cover the local scene... I am very content with our decision at this point! Though, with oppurtunity comes responsibility.

There is a shitload to do! Which kinda brings me to another thing that's been kinda big in my life lately...

Over the past month or so, I've been delving into the world of the indie musician. Doing research and reading books on music marketing, promotion, booking, etc. And it's called so much to my attention! We've been a band for a about two and a half years now, and, we've basically been completely oblivious to a HUGE aspect of our career! We've basically been sitting back at home waiting for someething to happen or someone to find us... and that just doesn't work! (sure, it got us fucked over by a fraudulent booking agency.)

I had basically always looked at our career in this way: we practice and play out at the shows that we're given, and then somebody will notice us, we'll be signed to a label and then our career will build itself from there...


not so much...

Through reading, researching, and listening to any advice I could get my hands on, I realized that that view of our career is completely wrong, and will most likely get us nowhere.

We have complete control of where we take this thing. And that's a hard thing to see when you've spent your time believing those hollywood rags to riches stories. (Cause most of the time they leave out the part about all the shit that they had to go through to get to where they are.)

We don't need a label at this point in our lives, and if we get things rolling smoothly enough, we may not need one at all! It is possible to market yourself successfully, book yourself, sell your stuff, it's all right here! The internet, basically, connects it all and makes the need for a label almost obsolete... I had a teacher about a year ago that said that this is a very strange time in the music industry... that the need for the middle man (record label) is no longer needed, that through the internet and it's resources and networking capabilities, it is possible for the artist to sell directly to the fans, bringing the cost of music down for the fan, and the profit up for the artist!

And by alot of Idustry professionals, this time is quickly becoming known as "the indie revoution", because artists are beginning to realize what they've got, and that signing their rights away may not be the right thing to do...

It's really exiting. But it stresses me out at the same time. I've began working on bookings and what not. I know we can get shows and airplay, but sometimes I just feel so overwhelmed... I don't know where to start and where to finish, it just seems like an endless sea of things to do to further our career.

But I'll get it done... soon... And we'll get some frequent bookings in SLC along with everything else we may need...

Well, I'm really tired and I know i've been rambling on about nothing, and I hope you found it enertaining. Leave me a comment.

Keep it metal,

PS Wish me luck, I'm going to begin the booking process tomorrow...